


Last Words

by ArcherSceptile



Category: Marvel (Comics), Marvel 616, The Incredible Hulk (Comics)
Genre: Civil War II #3, Civil War II (Marvel), Ficlet, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-13
Updated: 2019-12-13
Packaged: 2021-02-26 22:34:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21776650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArcherSceptile/pseuds/ArcherSceptile
Summary: He sits at his desk, writing about his lost love. He wants to get it all out there and get his feelings down.
Relationships: Bruce Banner/Betty Ross
Kudos: 7





	Last Words

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place right before the conclusion of Civil War II #3

_07/19/2016_

_Pain. That’s becoming a more common language than English now. I see the world around me moving forward, but I’m forever stuck in the past. Forever stuck reliving the fact I lost the love of my life. Forever wishing that things changed. I can never be happy. Whether it be due to the universe, or the Other Guy, I just can’t be happy. I’m not blameless. I made mistakes, my fair share of them. Especially with her. I didn’t cherish her enough when I had her. I became complacent. I would have given it all up for her, the membership with the Avengers, the science, anything, and everything if she so asked. But she wouldn’t ask me to do that, because that’s who she is… Who she was. I drove her out, just like I drove everyone out. Who could love me? Bear to look at me? No one should, but for some reason, she did. Even now, she still loves me. Somehow. It’s baffling. But of course, I pushed her away, just pushed her, and she finally left. Sometimes I cry, sometimes I get mad. But the blame is always on me, she didn’t do it. I pushed her to him. Now when I close my eyes, I see them together, living the life that I wish we could have had together. And it’s no one’s fault but my own. I have a secret. I… pushed her away because I was scared. Scared that she would see deep down the angry, bitter person I am. See all the cracks in my armor, and realize how worthless I am. Being vulnerable is a scary prospect, and she made me vulnerable like no other. Every time I look into her eyes, every time I see her smile, I fall more in love with her. It shouldn’t be like this. But… it happened. I fell in love with her harder than Hulk has ever punched anyone. And it terrified me. And it still does, if I’m being honest. But because of my fear, because of my hesitation, she’s gone and found someone else to make her happy. Now I look at everything we’ve been through, everything we’ve talked about, all the fights, the love, the hope I had for the future, and ask what was the point? Why did I fall in love when ultimately I couldn’t do what needed to be done. When I wouldn’t even tell her how I felt. All I did was bring pain to her because I know deep down, there has to be a part of her that hates me. I’d hate me. Granted, I already hate me, but that’s neither here nor there. Point is, I love her, with every fiber in my being, and if I could change my lack of action, I would. But I can’t, because she’s better off without me. She’s happier with him than she ever was with me. And it hurts. A lot. Not a day goes by where I don’t wish I was dead. But being with her, being around her, I started looking forward to what living has to offer. Now that she’s gone, I want to spiral, but I can’t. I contemplated dying, killing myself. Not just because of her, but because it’s just so much. Everything is. But, I have to hold it together. If I don’t, who knows what would happen? It’s not like I can talk to anyone, that’s why I’m doing this. But the sleepless nights, lack of eating, constant drinking, it’s been taking its toll. Science has been a nice tool to escape, but even doing the one thing I love can’t fill the hole in my heart. I will forever love her. Will she ever love me again? Who knows. If she does, it’ll kill me, knowing I’m not worth the effort, but if she doesn’t it’ll kill me because her love had started to become my strength. I just hope she can stay happy. If I had one wish, I’d wish - Carol is here? That’s interesting, I have no idea why Avengers are here, but I better see what they want. It shouldn’t take too long. I’ll be back to finish my thoughts._

From the desk of Robert Bruce Banner

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you guys liked this. I'm trying out new styles and story formats. Let me know what you guys think.


End file.
